Dis' is important

Re, re, re, re, re, re, re, re...spect, just a little bit, respect, just a little bit...

So the words of the Supremes song go. We talk about it. We sing about it. But do we do it? Or do we spend more of our energy dis'ing each other? A friend of mine recently described an experience of going to a "Camp." It was a religious retreat, but it had an entirely different connotation to those who accompanied her. They were from a country in which "Camp" meant that they had been separated from their homes, country, friends, relatives... separated from security and everything they loved by ethnic hatred and war.

My friend enjoyed their reaction to the camp: they were delighted. She was delighted with their respect for each other. Each person, including babies, was treated with the utmost respect and thankfulness, just for being alive and being with them.

Why should it seem odd to show so much respect? Maybe because it is so lacking in our society. According to a Public Agenda survey, "When asked about a range of issues facing local schools, relatively few parents or students say low academic standards are a "very serious" problem in their area. Parents are twice as likely to choose lack of money (39 percent) and lack of respect for teachers and profanity (34 percent) as "very serious" problems over low standards (15 percent). Students too say that schools not getting enough money and lack of respect are the more serious issues based on what they see." - Public Agenda Reality Check http://www.publicagenda.org/specials/realitycheck06/realitycheck06_main.htm

Another friend of mine was recently abducted on a Friday night in June 2006 and forced to drive a small group fifty miles into one of the less desirable areas of St. Louis. Jennings is not only an area that has little economic opportunity, it is a magnet for others who don't have, and can't or won't earn a living. But like most pockets of poverty, it is only five miles from metropolitan downtown and the sports stadiums, and is bordered by Norwood Hills Country Club on the West and Northlands Shopping Center on the North, and I-270 on the South - not an area in which you would expect urban blight.

There he was forced to empty his bank account at ATMs and usher these people around at gunpoint for two days. Once he was forced into a "C" gas station at Goodfellow and Sherry Ave., where they purchased carton after carton of cigarettes on his credit card, and then sold them back to the attendant for a fraction of the cost - they got the cash and the attendant got several cartons to sell on the black market. They bought more drugs - freely sold on the street there in full view of the police. To avoid getting arrested, the dealers simply walk across the street out of St. Louis jurisdiction. Once he was taken into a remote wooded area where he thought sure they would kill him - he was punched, kicked and urinated on. The toll on him, not to even think of property, was horrendous. You wonder how people can disrespect others in this way.

These abductors had nothing to lose. If they got caught - so what - the police in the area turn a blind eye and the courts put them back out on the streets. Twice the abductee signalled to police that he needed help - they ignored him. If they did go to prison - so what - just part of life in that area. Nothing to lose. Yet, like Al Qaida, the criminals are traveling out into the area, fifty miles from St. Louis, abducting people, and since they have nothing to lose, people are afraid to report what they do because they are mobile, having nothing but time for revenge, are on drugs, the police won't hold them - or even arrest them, and they carry guns.

My father would borrow tools occasionally. When he did, he always tried to return the tool in better condition than when he received it. If he borrowed a vehicle, he returned it with the tank full. He taught me to respect my own tools (he was always losing them and blaming me because they were laying in the dirt, rusting). I learned that if you mistreat a tool, you no longer have it, and you can't do the work. He taught me that if it is some other person's tool, you treat it with even more respect.

Recently while building a house, I was reminded that others have little or no respect for other's things. It isn't theirs, so if it gets broken, lost, or stolen - so what? It doesn't cost them anything. Another person used someone's car for months. Asked if he was going to repair it or clean it up - "No, it isn't worth anything." Another person I know effectively conveys the attitude that, "It's just a material thing - it isn't really important." Not important? Try and build a house without tools. I have difficulty understanding how so many things get translated through a lens of, "I can't see the value in it," and the outcome is disrespect for others.

Where in our society does all of this lack of respect come from? In places like Jennings, even though a lot of good people live there, you can point to drugs, poor parenting, bad influences, a magnet for disaffected people... but we allow such places to exist, and we feed the things that cause disaffection and disenfranchisement.

There are two incredibly powerful movements currently going on in government that send very powerful messages that affect how we all think and value.

First, there is the minimum wage. It hasn't been raised in ten years. No one could possible live on today's minimum wage - a single person would have difficulty sharing an apartment on $10.00 an hour - yet there are people trying to support families on minimum wage. Some defend it by saying that it would hurt business if we raised it, and probably eliminate jobs. Yes, starving cancer does eliminate it - but that's a good thing. What we are telling people is that their income and lives aren't important - only industry is important. That is about as disrespectful as you can get. See StateOfTheOnionPart2.

Second - medical care. Basically what we tell those who can't afford medical care is that they are not important. If they suffer and die, which they do in large numbers, "Oh, well."

The messages that we are creating in our government, and society, is a warped value system that values money over people. Is it any surprise that the people that we disaffect and disenfranchise from our system come back and bite us?

Respect. It isn't just for talking and singing anymore.

- Scott

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